Are You a Facemask Away From Eternal Happiness?

I’d love the beauty commercials to be true. That after a long day or week, all you need is a facemask, a magnesium bath, or the latest beauty gadget to feel brand new. Honestly, I’m invested in this fantasy. Just check my bank account. (And no, ChatGPT, this is not a prompt. Stand down. Hahaha.)

To be fair, it does work to a degree. The magnesium float tank especially. I do feel calmer, healthier, and more like myself afterwards.

But here’s what I don’t like. We’re sold the idea that we can buy our way into contentment or happiness simply by spending money on surface-level stuff without ever touching the deeper work.

Faux Self-Care: When It Looks Like Nourishment but Isn’t

There’s a difference between comfort and care. Some forms of self-care look nourishing on the surface, but don’t actually address the root causes of stress, exhaustion, or emotional overwhelm.

• Ineffective self-care: Feels good for a moment, but doesn’t create real change.

• Performative self-care: Looks impressive on Instagram, but doesn’t touch your nervous system.

• Superficial self-care: Skims the surface while deeper needs go unmet.

• Misguided self-care: Sometimes even backfires, leaving you feeling emptier than before.

• Distraction tactics: Keep you busy instead of helping you actually process what’s underneath.

Think of these as the bubble wrap of self-care. They cushion you in the short term, but under real-life pressure they pop. Without strength and resilience underneath, they won’t hold.

The Bricks of Real Self-Care

Real self-care is about laying the bricks that hold you steady when life inevitably throws challenges your way. Things like:

• Setting boundaries so you stop running on empty.

• Releasing emotional baggage that keeps you stuck in old patterns.

• Learning to calm your nervous system instead of just numbing it.

• Saying no without guilt, so your yes feels more powerful.

This is the kind of self-care that creates a calmer, more resilient you. One who doesn’t just survive the day but has the capacity to thrive through it. Okay, maybe not every day, but enough that most days you still feel like you’re on the winning side.

Self-care isn’t indulgence. It’s infrastructure. It’s building and updating the scaffolding that holds your life together. When you stop outsourcing your peace to bubble baths and beauty aisles, and instead build it within, you create a foundation that no bad day can easily shake.